I Hate you Mom! Part 3

Dearest fruit of my loins, aka Faith and Phoebe,

A note on bed time. Yes, I understand that you want to stay up.  I understand that in your mind, mommy and daddy wait until you are in sleepy time land to crack open a can of fun.  Yes, we have clowns, and in fact, and entire circus comes to life in our living room once your little heads nod off.  Just last night, I was talking to the bearded lady over a pint about how the pros and cons of shaving and waxing.  Of course you'll know nothing about either of those things right now, but she is surprisingly knowledgeable about all manner of grooming.  Oh! And your father and I took turns on the trapeze.  They had a harder time flinging your daddy around but nonetheless, we had a blast.  Eating peanuts with the elephants, discussing the importance of drinking water with the flame eaters, and of course, I had to get a high five from the lions just for Phoebe's sake.  I mean... there was a giant CAT* !  I had to say wassup.

Of course you can use the bathroom for the 5th time in 2 minutes. Yep, the dog is still laying down. No, I don't think you need to change your pajamas again... who do you think is going to visit? Justin Bieber? and didn't we talk about that little thug? He is a bad dude... forget about him.  Yes, I can leave a light on.  No, you don't need another snack.  Yes I love you. No I didn't forget to give you hugs and kisses... this is the 3rd set right here, okay? MUAH, (Squeeze).  FINE! Sorry I will give them to you in the "proper order"... (Squeeze), Muah.  Yes Phoebe, I will hug and kiss you again too. No I don't love Faithy more.  You are both awesome.  NO more water! You just went to the bathroom 5 times.... make that 6. Get back in bed please!


 Seriously you two!  There is nothing exciting happening after you go to sleep.  Most nights mommy is trying like hell to get her coaching work done, or create new blogs for this blog, which is rather ironic that I am writing a blog about how you don't want to go to bed while arguing with you about how you don't want to go to bed, and that I need to write my blog (about how you don't like to go to bed on time). There will come a time when sleep is all you want to do.  There will also come a time that you will want to sleep in until noon, and I promise you as your mother whom loves you very much, that I will wake your butt up bright and early like you currently do to me on a Saturday at 4AM.  And even as I write this, and you have argued yourself to sleep on my rocking chair behind me... I cannot help but smile.  You are too freaking adorable Faith.

I know you want to stay up, and I know you think you are missing things, but you aren't. Sweeties, I wish I could put your minds to rest about this matter.  But you wouldn't believe me unless I went to bed at the same time as you and shut all the lights off.  Right now, that is just not possible.  One day I hope that you will look back at this and say, "At least she was trying to do that work when we were asleep, and not taking time away from our family time to work".  You don't understand what is going on, or why I work into the late hours of the night .. sometimes early morning, but you will soon enough.

You think I am being unfair, but I promise you that I am simply trying to make a better life for our family, and for others who seek my help.  Your mommy cares about the world... but she cares about you two and daddy most of all.

Love, 
The most unfair mommy in the whole world


* Phoebe at this time in your life you are obsessed with cats... you think you are a cat, and have, on a number of occasions, told me that I stole you from your cat mother in the forest, and that I didn't actually birth you.  We've endured a lot of face licking from you as well.  Just sayin.

My FAT loss / Weight loss Story

I Hate You Mom! Episode 2

Imagine if you will, morning in a sleepy town like any other small town.  A mother zipping around the house, getting clothes for the children, cooking breakfast for the family, and trying desperately to remember all of the things that need to be done on a Monday morning before school and work.

In a whir of sound and fury come the children abounding and both slinging rapid fire questions about breakfast and what they want, and how they want it, and where is the cinnamon toast crunch?....

The mother says simply, "please leave the kitchen". And in between more loud shouts of demands she says more firmly, "Please leave the kitchen".  And still with even more questions, and now the children are stopping her from being able to move about the kitchen to prepare not only breakfast for everyone, but also snacks and lunch for her and daddy. Finally the mother has had enough and yells, "I SAID LEAVE THE KITCHEN!"

The children flee and scream, running down the hallway as if chased by the Walking Dead.  And 1 minute later one returns... the brown haired, brown-eyed, stubborn and brave little Phoebe.  She peeks around the fridge asking, "So are we going to Dunkin Donuts for breakfast?"  Mother replies, "No".

After the look of "YOU KILLED MY CAT" from Phoebe, and huge tears welling in her eyes... she says, "you are the meanest mommy ever!"

So, here is the deal my little darlings...  My job is not to cater to your every desire.  I am your mommy and am therefore in charge of making sure you eat properly, you go to school, you remain somewhat non-infectious through bathing and hand washing, and of course LOVING YOU.  You will not bully me into doing something I have already said "NO" to.  No, simply means No.  And that simple lesson is one you need to learn, because it applies in a lot of different scenarios.  One being boys, and I won't even go there right now.  But, what I want to express to future you, is that you; I am sure, are happy that I did not feed you junk all of the time.  I gather that you are probably passing along proper eating to your children as you read this.  At least I hope you are.  I want to explain why I am so adamant about not doing fast food and junk on a regular basis... and I want to apologize for the amount of times we have used it, or consumed it that has led you to believe this should happen more often.

Growing up the way we did on such a fixed income, we did not have the ability to be choosy about what we ate. Mom (Your grandma Hope) made due with what she had. That meant a ton of pasta, hamburger helper, rice, and any other number of low cost meals.  We ate bowls of white rice covered in milk butter and sugar for dinner because it was easy, and cheap.  And I appreciate all of the hard work that she and Papa Mike went through to put that food on our table.  However, I had a weight problem due largely to the food I was eating.  And it continued into adulthood because I did not know HOW to eat healthy, nor did I know I wasn't.

I have the knowledge now, and because I know that I have struggled with addiction to sweets (because I always had them on hand as a child and a teenager)... I know the same can happen to you. So, I just don't have them around.  I want you to look at cookies and cake as treats for once in a while, not an every night occurrence.  I want you to eat the foods that you need so your body works properly. I want you to be healthy, and have the best chance at not being obese, getting sick, or have bad skin.  I'm not telling you these things as children right now, because I do not want to put that worry on you.  No, I keep that to myself.

So,  I will take the dirty looks. I will listen to how horrible I am for not buying your cinnamon toast crunch anymore... because I hope one day, when you are running races, or being athletic in some way, or simply playing with your children, you can look back and say, "She really did care about us."  I don't want you to endure the teasing, and the struggles I went through.  I don't want you to perpetuate the history of heart disease and digestive cancers with which our family is plagued.  I want to give your insides the best chance possible at being healthy in a world of fast food, convenience, and gluttony.  I love you both!
Sincerely,
~The Worst, Meanest Mom EVER!~

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