Moms of multiples, gather round, and no I don't mean moms with 3 or more kids that were born as singletons. No offense, because you certainly are no slacker, but this is stuff only moms of twins, triplets, quads, and "OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU FIT ALL OF THOSE INSIDE OF YOU" moms would truly understand..
#1 - For the first few months of their lives (if you chose to breastfeed- bless your heart), you will be a milk cow. You will either have both children, or a machine perpetually suckling at your teats around the clock. Your husband will vie for some boob time, but seriously... the only thing you'll want to do when he grabs a hold of them is punch him in the face. Simple say, "Dearest husband, unless you are actively helping with massage to help loosen my milk sacs because they feel like they are about to rupture and all I want to do is scream, RELEASE THE BOOBS! You are restricted to gazing fondly until such time as I choose to stop this masochistic cycle of feeding and pumping." And one other tip... place a stack of books next to your chosen milking station. I made it through at least 4 books per week.
#2 - You know those leashes for children that you used to think were horribly degrading for the child upon which they were fastened? And you would look at the parents with the meanest stink eye you could muster? Guess what??? You will be buying a couple when your babies start to walk/run and you want to walk through the mall/airport without the gigantic stroller that will never fit in a regular sized car or an airplane. Yep, embrace the leash because when baby A decides that going left at full speed, while Baby B goes right at full speed, you'll wish you had something to reel them back in, or stop them in their tracks. They have adorable stuffed animal ones that double as a back pack, so suck it up, and be THAT parent. We can't all have an entourage like Kate +8 or the rest of those reality moms of multiples. And before you get all soap-boxy I am not talking about leashing your kids at the park. Hold their hand you say, OH! Yep, I never thought of that. Let me know how well your twin 2 year olds abide the hand-holding when they suddenly see an entire store of DISNEY!
#3 - No matter how hard you try, there will come a time when each of your children throw the "you love _____ more than you love me" craptastic comment at you. Understand that this is inevitable, and is simply a ploy for additional attention. Unless you are showing favoritism toward one child.. in which case, you should listen, and rethink some things. In case you didn't notice yet, I do not sugar coat!! But hey, you love me right? ;-) . In all seriousness, I will occasionally split up my twins, and one goes with Daddy for the day on a date, and one goes with me on a date. That way they both have a moment where they are truly the center of attention, and they don't feel like they need to compete.
#4 - You will be faced with a "Buy 2 or 1" dilemma every single day until they are out of your home. Buy 2 of the same dolls or 1 to share? Buy 2 of the same dress, or 1 from 2 different styles? Buy 2 T-Rexes or 1. And we have not made it to the car age yet... but again.. they are both going to be driving at the SAME time, so do you buy 2 cars, or 1 that they can learn and share the driving? Know this... whatever you do is what is right for your family. DO NOT allow other people to tell you what you should or should not do. Some kids are great with sharing, while others will start World War III if you say they have to share anything, including the oxygen around them. Choose your battles, and know your financial limits. that is all I am sayin.
#5 - You will have to make a lot of tough decisions with multiples. Keep them in the same class room when they start school? Keep them together until the school splits them up? Put both of them in the same activity or let them both choose different ones? Having 2 kids at the same age going through the same things at the same time is a blessing and a curse. It is NOT the same as having 2 children of differing ages.
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| Get ready to answer several irritating questions every day. |
I will also add that you will have 2 teething at the same time, potentially 2 colic babies at the same time, 2 sick babies at the same time, 2 tantrums to end all tantrums at the same time, feeding baby food to 2 at the same time. You will amaze yourself at what one or 2 people can accomplish when working as a united front. I have 3 pieces of advice for you Moms of multiples:
1. Be kind to your spouse... they are your only ally
2. Be kind to your spouse... they are your only ally
3. Be kind to your spouse... they are your only ally
Get it? Got it? Good!
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